{"id":528,"date":"2012-01-16T09:00:33","date_gmt":"2012-01-16T07:00:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/?p=528"},"modified":"2011-10-06T15:52:29","modified_gmt":"2011-10-06T13:52:29","slug":"me-magneticke-pole-14","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/povidky\/me-magneticke-pole\/me-magneticke-pole-14","title":{"rendered":"M\u00e9 magnetick\u00e9 pole (14)"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n \n \"Fb-Button\"\n <\/a>\n <\/div>
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To se takhle jednou dali do \u0159e\u010di k\u016f\u0148 a osel.<\/p>\n

\u201eTak se mi od ka\u010deny doneslo, jak\u00fd pro lidstvo pr\u00fd m\u00e1\u0161 neb\u00fdvale negativn\u00ed p\u0159\u00ednos, osle,\u201c spustil k\u016f\u0148. \u201e\u017de pr\u00fd ka\u017ed\u00fd, kdo z t\u00e9 lidsk\u00e9 \u0159\u00ed\u0161e nese tv\u00e9 jm\u00e9no, je p\u011bkn\u00fd osel.\u201c A zahih\u0148al se tomu.<\/p>\n

\u201e\u017de j\u00ed huba neupadne. \u00cd\u00e1, j\u00e1 a orel. S n\u00edm j\u00e1 nem\u00e1m v\u016fbec nic spole\u010dn\u00e9ho,\u201c za\u010dal se h\u00e1jit osel.<\/p>\n

\u201eNesm\u00ed\u0161 se na to d\u00edvat zase tak \u010dern\u011b,\u201c radil mu k\u016f\u0148.<\/p>\n

\u201eA jak bych asi mohl, kdy\u017e ani s \u010dernou zv\u011b\u0159\u00ed nejsem v \u017e\u00e1dn\u00e9m p\u0159\u00edbuzensk\u00e9m vztahu?\u201c oponoval d\u00e1l osel. \u201eKdy\u017e u\u017e jsme ale u toho, tak i o tob\u011b se v t\u00e9 lidsk\u00e9 \u0159\u00ed\u0161\u00ed hodn\u011b hanliv\u00e9ho napov\u00edd\u00e1,\u201c pravil a tentokr\u00e1t se pro zm\u011bnu o svoji jmenovku za\u010dal strachovat zase k\u016f\u0148. \u201e\u017de pr\u00fd lid\u00e9 po tv\u00e9m vzoru mnohdy pl\u00e1caj\u00ed jen sam\u00e9 koniny a je\u0161t\u011b si jednu po\u0159\u00e1dnou k tomu s chut\u00ed zavdaj\u00ed.\u201c<\/p>\n

Osel se tomu zahih\u0148al a tak vyrovnal s\u00edly vz\u00e1jemn\u00fdch posm\u011b\u0161k\u016f.<\/p>\n

\u201eTo racek, \u017ee jo? Stejn\u011b, jako ta ka\u010dena, ani on nezav\u0159e ten sv\u016fj nevym\u00e1chan\u00fd zob\u00e1k. A je\u0161t\u011b se nav\u00edc p\u0159i tom drze checht\u00e1, jak mu to p\u0159ijde z\u00e1bavn\u00e9, opi\u010d\u00e1k jeden. \u017de mu ten zob\u00e1k v\u016fbec narostl,\u201c m\u00ednil te\u010f podr\u00e1\u017ed\u011bn\u011b k\u016f\u0148.<\/p>\n

\u201eJen\u017ee co je tohle v porovn\u00e1n\u00ed se strakou, kter\u00e1 v jednom kuse jen krade,\u201c vzpomn\u011bl si n\u00e1hle osel. \u201eJ\u00e1 tu svoji osinu v zadku po\u0159\u00e1d ne a ne naj\u00edt.\u201c A pak ho napadlo: \u201eTak v\u0161echny ty posm\u011bv\u00e1\u010dky zamordujeme a hned budou m\u00edt po pt\u00e1k\u00e1ch. Kdy\u017e naopak my budeme mazan\u00ed jako li\u0161ka a d\u00e1me jim po jej\u00edm vzoru dobrou noc…\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eTo tak,\u201c nenechal k\u016f\u0148 osla domluvit, \u201ea od jara a\u017e do zimy budu dennodenn\u011b \u017er\u00e1t ten nejubo\u017eej\u0161\u00ed obrok jako ten nejubo\u017eej\u0161\u00ed d\u016fchodce z t\u00e9 lidsk\u00e9 \u0159\u00ed\u0161e, kdy\u017e to praskne.\u201c<\/p>\n

A pak zase kon\u011b pro zm\u011bnu cosi sp\u00e1sn\u00e9ho napadlo: \u201eLeda, osle, \u017ee bys mi n\u011bco p\u016fj\u010dil a j\u00e1 bych na ten mord zkusil podplatit krajtu tygrovanou. V\u00edce hlav, v\u00edc v\u00ed. A ta krajta a ten tygr by n\u00e1s ur\u010dit\u011b v\u0161ech t\u011bch zv\u00ed\u0159ec\u00edch otrap\u016f jednou prov\u017edy zbavily. Jen\u017ee jsem zrovna \u0161vorc a to jsem ti, osle, ned\u00e1vno vyhr\u00e1l Velkou Pardubickou.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eJ\u00e1 ti sotva n\u011bco p\u016fj\u010d\u00edm, proto\u017ee nem\u00e1m ani ten uboh\u00fd \u010dtvr\u0165\u00e1k,\u201c odpov\u011bd\u011bl osel.<\/p>\n

Tohle kon\u011b nejen nepot\u011b\u0161ilo, ale i pom\u011brn\u011b dost p\u0159ekvapilo. \u201eJak to \u017ee jsi taky tot\u00e1ln\u011b \u0161vorc? Co mi to tu vykl\u00e1d\u00e1\u0161 za poh\u00e1dky, osle? P\u0159ece sta\u010d\u00ed, abys ses trochu ot\u0159\u00e1sl a pen\u011bz bude jako \u017eelez,\u201c nam\u00edtl. \u201eNo tak osl\u00ed\u010dku, ot\u0159e\u0161 se!\u201c poru\u010dil.<\/p>\n

\u201eHmm, b\u00fdv\u00e1valo,\u201c pravil osel, kdy\u017e se o to pokusil a ono opravdu nic.<\/p>\n

\u201eTo je hned vid\u011bt, \u017ee ti osel ne\u0159\u00edkaj\u00ed nadarmo, osle,\u201c dal mu k\u016f\u0148 najevo, co si o n\u011bm st\u00e1le mysl\u00ed.
\n\u201eCo v\u010dely? P\u0159ece se o nich \u0159\u00edk\u00e1, jak jsou piln\u00e9,\u201c napadlo osla. \u201eTy by n\u00e1mi zadanou pr\u00e1ci tedy mohly odv\u00e9st t\u0159eba i zadarmo, kdy\u017e je ta pilnost tolik zaj\u00edm\u00e1.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eNa ty zapome\u0148. Ty leda tak zaj\u00edm\u00e1 pyl. A zadarmo? To sotva, kdy\u017e v\u010dely v jednom kuse hl\u00eddaj\u00ed i cenu medu,\u201c zaprotestoval k\u016f\u0148.<\/p>\n

\u201eTak pak u\u017e holt zb\u00fdv\u00e1 jen ta sova, kdy\u017e se o n\u00ed \u0159\u00edk\u00e1, \u017ee opl\u00fdv\u00e1 moudrem,\u201c dostal osel dal\u0161\u00ed sp\u00e1sn\u00fd n\u00e1pad, a\u017e se k\u016f\u0148 za\u010dal n\u00e1hle podivovat, jak na n\u011bco tak geni\u00e1ln\u00edho v\u016fbec dok\u00e1zal p\u0159ij\u00edt.<\/p>\n

\u201eOno ob\u010das nen\u00ed na \u0161kodu d\u00e1t si chytrou ka\u0161i,\u201c uvedl osel. \u201eJe\u0161t\u011b si j\u00ed trochu te\u010f zobnu a t\u0159eba se ze m\u011b zanedlouho stane p\u0159\u00edmo kr\u00e1l zv\u00ed\u0159at.<\/p>\n

\u201eDme\u0161 se p\u00fdchou jako p\u00e1v, osle,\u201c poznamenal varovn\u011b k\u016f\u0148. \u201eJestli se o tomhle lev dozv\u00ed, tak u\u017e leda tak bude\u0161 uplat\u0148oval z\u00e1kon d\u017eungle: kdo ute\u010de, ten vyhraje.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eTen ur\u010dit\u011b nen\u00ed zase tak mazan\u00fd jako li\u0161ka,\u201c nar\u016fstalo oslovi po dal\u0161\u00edm po\u017eit\u00ed vtipn\u00e9 ka\u0161e ok\u00e1zale sebev\u011bdom\u00ed.<\/p>\n

\u201eNo abys ses pak nedivil, osle, proto\u017ee pokud si o tom budou \u0161t\u011bbetat i vrabci na st\u0159e\u0161e, tak u\u017e ti pak nepom\u016f\u017ee ani ta rada moudr\u00e9 sovy a ty bude\u0161 ho\u0159ce litovat, \u017ee nebyl lep\u0161\u00ed vrabec v hrsti a ten n\u00e1sledn\u011b zabit na zp\u016fsob dvou much jednou ranou,\u201c du\u0161oval se k\u016f\u0148. \u201eTo bys pak u\u017e jedin\u011b musel po\u017e\u00e1dat vla\u0161tovky,\u00a0 zda-li by t\u011b sebou nevzaly do tepl\u00fdch krajin, \u010di rovnou jednu celou holub\u00ed po\u0161tu\u00a0 pro nouzovou \u00faschovu. Proto\u017ee jinak hroz\u00ed, \u017ee t\u011b skute\u010dn\u011b st\u00e1hnou z k\u016f\u017ee jako kr\u00e1l\u00edka.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eKikirik\u00ed!\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201eNo vid\u00ed\u0161, m\u00e1lem bych zapomn\u011bl. My tu spolu pl\u00e1c\u00e1me koniny a j\u00e1 u\u017e m\u011bl b\u00fdt d\u00e1vno v Chuchli a d\u011blat tam kopytem sem, kopytem tam,\u201c vzpomn\u011bl si n\u00e1hle k\u016f\u0148.<\/p>\n

\u201eTak to se m\u00e1\u0161 co oh\u00e1n\u011bt. A a\u017e tam bude\u0161, tak si dej pozor na rann\u00ed pt\u00e1\u010de, co d\u00e1l dosk\u00e1\u010de. Tak aby ti to ne\u0161lo stejn\u011b jako psovi pastva,\u201c za\u010dal znovu pou\u010dovat osel.<\/p>\n

\u201eTy jsi, osle, v\u00e1\u017en\u011b otravn\u00fd jako ta osina v zadku.\u201c<\/p>\n

A s t\u011bmito slovy se k\u016f\u0148 vzd\u00e1lil. Oslovi to nijak zvl\u00e1\u0161\u0165 nevadilo. L\u00edn\u00fd jako ve\u0161 a ti\u0161e jak my\u0161ka hodlal zalehnout. Po vy\u010derp\u00e1vaj\u00edc\u00edm rozhovoru s kon\u011bm se c\u00edtil ospal\u00fd jako medv\u011bd. I p\u0159esto v sob\u011b je\u0161t\u011b na moment dok\u00e1zal pozdr\u017eet man\u00fdry lenochoda a znovu si zavdal z trn\u00ed a bodl\u00e1\u010d\u00ed, v domn\u011bn\u00ed, \u017ee si nad\u00e1le pochutn\u00e1v\u00e1 na on\u00e9 chytr\u00e9 ka\u0161i.<\/p>\n

\n \n \"Fb-Button\"\n <\/a>\n <\/div>
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To se takhle jednou dali do \u0159e\u010di k\u016f\u0148 a osel. \u201eTak se mi od ka\u010deny doneslo, jak\u00fd pro lidstvo pr\u00fd m\u00e1\u0161 neb\u00fdvale negativn\u00ed p\u0159\u00ednos, osle,\u201c spustil k\u016f\u0148. \u201e\u017de pr\u00fd ka\u017ed\u00fd, kdo z t\u00e9 lidsk\u00e9 \u0159\u00ed\u0161e nese tv\u00e9 jm\u00e9no, je p\u011bkn\u00fd … Cel\u00fd p\u0159\u00edsp\u011bvek →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_s2mail":"yes","footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-528","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-me-magneticke-pole"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/528","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=528"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/528\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":529,"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/528\/revisions\/529"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=528"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=528"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/eldar.cz\/tompatrick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=528"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}